Inclusion

It was Open House at Ashlynn's school tonight. She'll be starting at a new school this year. This bums me out  because she just became acclimated to all-day school a month before summer break. So we start over. Ashlynn is in an SLC class all day long. She has a spectacular teacher and 3 para-educators in the class. This is amazing because there is less that ten kids in the class. At her old elementary school her teacher implemented a program where all of the kids had a lunch buddy from a general ed class that would come to the SLC classroom and eat with their buddy. They also had library, recess, and music time with the general ed population. At the new elementary school this is the FIRST SLC class the school has ever had (the school is only 5 years old). I know that her teacher can do wonders for this school. Every school should have exposure to a kids with different needs. 

When I was young and in school I only saw the special ed class in passing, while classes were changing. Never did we interact with the children in those classes. I thought about that tonight. Will the kids at recess include Ashlynn, like they did at her old school. She made lots of sweet friends there. When we see them in the community they run to her, ask for a hug and ask her how she is doing. 

Over the summer and even tonight as we were out with the kids and they were playing I heard negative comments coming from the other children that Ashlynn was around. I don't know if they knew why she was different, but they did notice she didn't act like the other kids and in their own little way were shunning her. It really made my heart sink, deep down to the pit of my stomach. She had no idea what they were doing or what their words or games meant. She just knew there were other kids to play with and she wanted to play. 

When will she realize that not everyone wants to play with her because she is different? When will she realize she is being left out, and will she know why? I remember a story a friend told once. She had a friend whose daughter had Down Syndrome. As she picked her up from school her daughter was unusually quiet and she asked her what was wrong. Her daughter replied, "mom, what is retarded?" Someone had called her daughter that awful word and she had to explain to her what it meant and why the other children were using that word. It's just awful. Children can just be awful.

I didn't understand Down Syndrome when I was a child. Would I have been one to leave someone out?  I would not have teased them, but leaving someone out can be just as hurtful.

Tonight I cried for Ashlynn and what she'll have to go through in her life. Tonight I cried like I did when she was born, because I realized, again, that this world is full of cruel people who will never know how sweet she is and witness her unconditional love for others. She will have some amazing moments and I don't want mean words to over shadow those fantastic times. 

So I'm glad and scared that she has the opportunity, as well as others in her class to teach the other 400 children in her school about inclusion. I'm thankful that she has a fantastic and loving teacher who is willing to start over at this school to show to others, that these children are just as fun, smart, and beautiful as the rest. When I look at Ashlynn, now almost seven years old, I still see this happy, smiling, six month old face. I think I always will.

It's been forever!

It has been forever since I've posted on my weight loss blog. I mainly just focus on my family blog. Here's the update. I worked with a trainer in July of 2011. He got me started on a really focused weight training program. I also buckled down and cut out all sugar and carbs for two whole months. It was extremely difficult. I was consuming about 1100 calories a day and eating at least 100 grams of protein from whey protein shakes, lean chicken and egg whites. Other than that I was eating green veggies and drinking a lot of water. After those two months I slowly added carbs back into my diet.

When I started this whole journey of healthy eating and weight training I was at 156 lbs. Now 7 months later I feel fantastic at 137 lbs. I weight train 5 hours a week and get 4 hours of cardio in every week. I'm eating between 1300-1500 calories a day and losing about one pound every month.

I stopped weighing myself each week. It got to be so tedious. As long as I am feeling great, getting my workout in and increasing my weights in my workouts, and my clothes are fitting, that's all that counts.

It's fun to be able to compare where I was last year.

Last year :

size 12 (L)

156lbs

dumbbell bench press - 15lbs each

dumbbell bicep curls - 15lbs each

2 push ups

30 second plank

squats - no added weights

NOW:

size 4-6 (S)

137lbs

dumbbell bench press - 30lbs each

dumbbell bicep curl - 25lbs each

20 push ups

3 minute plank

squats - added 50 lbs

I look back at where I was and wonder why I let myself become so unhealthy. I was literally uncomfortable in my own skin 24 hours a day. Now, I love my body and where I'm headed with my fitness.

Thanks to

OCTOBER~DOWN SYNDROME AWARENESS MONTH

Oh, how I LOVE this little girl! She is my life and my joy. She is one of the greatest reasons I am here. To teach her and to love her every day. It is Down Syndrome Awareness month and I hope this little face helps others understand that being different should be accepted and celebrated by everyone.

CREED:

My face might be different

But my feelings the same

I laugh and I cry

And I take pride in my gains

I was sent here among you

To teach you to love

As god in the heavens

Looks down from above

To him I’m no different

His love knows no bounds

It’s those here among you

In cities and towns

That judge me by standards

That man has imparted

But this family I’ve chosen

Will help me get started

For I’m one of the children

So special and few

That came here to learn

The same lessons as you

That love is acceptance

It must come from the heart

We all have the same purpose

Though not the same start

The Lord gave me life

To live and embrace

And I’ll do as you do

But at my own pace.

Atkins

I've been reading "The New Akins For a New You". I love it! It makes so much sense and if you are a carbo-holic like me, it can really help. Before reading the book I assumed Atkins was just eating high fat meats all day. Completely not true. You do eat alot of meat but it can be fish, poultry, or beef. Then, your other staple is vegetables. The first two weeks will be the most difficult. You're allowed 20 net carbs everyday for the first two weeks. Those carbs come from veggies since meat has virtually no carbs at al. Most veggies have between 0.1 and 2 carbs. So, you can see you eat alot of them. The book says you'll eventually lose the cravings for carbs, which is a goal. The next phases of Atkins you slowly add in net grams of carbs until you find you're magic number. The number of carbs your body can be allowed each day with the ability to still lose weight. Everyone is different. Some bodies can handle 40 carbs and some 120 carbs. I remember losing alot of weight my Senior year of high school. This is how I was eating I just didn't know it was Atkins. I like how the book explains what good and bad carbs are and also about sugar and sugar alcohols. How they are absorbed in the body and their function is also explained. This diet also helps cholesterol, hypertention and type 2 diabetes. It's really interesting. I'm going to start fully when we get back from our vacation. The book says not to start if you're about to go on vacation. You need to have the time and means to do it. But I will be cutting back until I really start. Wish me luck. I'm really excited about the results. The first two weeks can wield a loss of up to 15 lbs. But I want to continue until this is a lifestyle.

Wednesday Weigh In

I must be losing just water. This week I am 150.6 and I dont feel much different in my clothes. My tummy is slighty smaller but my pants are fitting the same. It's really difficult for me to get out of the 150's. I've been in the 150's most of my adult life - after kids anyway. I've only gotten to the 140's and 130's because my thyroid has gone wacky on me. One hundred and fifty pounds if my body's comfortable weight. Not to say that I'm comfortable in my body at 150. I feel best in the low 140's. I really want to get there. I started Synthroid this week so maybe that will help jumpstart my metablism... Until next week.

Wednesday Weigh In

I have not yet bought a battery for my home scale yet. Can you believe it?? But I did get my weigh in done today. I met with my Endocrinologist to talk about my thyroid. I'm hypo AGAIN. So I'll begin taking synthroid again. I will be on the lowest dose so that's great. I weighed in at her office at 152.6. So that's almost a two pound loss. I'm happy with that since I haven't done a great job at what I should be doing.

Still Here

Ok, why is it such a battle day to day?! You know when you're trying to diet and exercise, does it not consume you? You're daily actions and your thoughts! It's so consuming. On the days when, "oh crap, I can't workout today", it's depressing when you're working toward a goal right? This past week has been busy to the point of explosion. I hate the days when 2:30 rolls around and I just need a nap. Literally! I'm lucky to have two children that have naps that sync up so I can nap.
I have been hyper-thyroid since Harry was born. I think now it's starting to fall behind. I'll go next week to have that checked. I think that's why I'm sleepy. Harry still wakes up between 3-4 times a night which I've gotten use to but it does not help my internal clock.
I have the option to wake up at 6am to work out before getting Ashlynn ready for school but I don't. I choose those extra 90 minutes of sleep.
I've been doing OK this past week. I can do better. So next week will be better. By the way,there wasn't a weigh in this week because the battery in my scale died and have I bought another one... NO. So my weigh in will be this weekend. I'm hoping and praying not to be shocked by a gain. Until then...